Garden Alive: Feng Shui on the Path

My husband has completed the enormous project of cutting a path through our backyard hill as discussed in a past blog. As with many projects that have a purpose, it took on a life of its own. He listened to its flow and followed the energy to create a beautiful, meandering walk through a once unwalkable hill.

What the path accomplished for us is a definition of areas. Instead of one big hill to consider, we now have smaller garden plots that can be treated as a unit. One day as I was walking the path, I was inspired with an idea that will help define the areas even more, which is to give them specific names. We could name one of them after our cat Bodhi who typically sits in that part of the hill—the Bodhi Garden. Another area where years ago we placed a lawn ornament with the Chinese character for ch’i could be called The Ch’i Garden.

When incorporating Feng Shui in a home, I’m very specific about instructing people to use all the rooms in their home. If not, some part of the home and their lives will become stagnant. It has become blatantly obvious this same concept must be applied to the garden as well. If there are parts of your garden or yard you can’t get to or don’t access, something is going to be dormant in your own life.

Whether we stay with the suggested names is yet to be determined. Not only does the gardener himself have to determine their appropriate titles, but also the garden. Anyone who has walked the path comes away with a smile on their face and their spirits lifted. Something came alive when the path was uncovered, and it isn’t just us. Everyday I see our cats strolling on the new walkway. In fact, one day I found one of them actually sleeping on the path. Knowing how cats are so sensitive to energy, I have no doubt an energy has surfaced offering a fresh message from the land. I’ll bet the garden can offer up some great names—better than any we’d conjure up or imagine.

Rocking the Flow: Keeping Feng Shui in the Family

In recent days with the deaths of so many celebrities, I’m brought back to a question that has been nagging me for years. The question has to do with stuff----more specifically, who’s going to deal with my stuff after I’m gone. I presume this is critical for me because I have no children of my own who will take care of this issue. The thought of a stranger making decisions about my treasures doesn’t set well.

When my Mom passed away, she had reduced her life to one room. Clearing out most of her things had occurred in the years prior to her death, so that once she was gone the remainder of her clothes and furniture were disposed of in half a day. I always appreciated that about her. My sister, however, is still going through my niece’s extensive collections of stuff five years after she died

When my Dad’s mother passed away about fifty years ago he came back from her funeral in North Dakota with her rocker. She had rocked all eleven of her babies in that chair. My Dad refinished it and now I have it. I’ve treasured it with all my heart over the years, but I have often thought about what will happen to it when I’m no longer around to appreciate its beauty and its history.

A valid question could be why I’d care if I’m dead. But this isn’t about me, it’s about the rocker and where it belongs. My sister isn’t interested in it; my nephew doesn’t understand its meaning. So last summer when some cousins from North Dakota were visiting, I showed them the rocker. One of them remembered Grandma’s rocker that had been in her bedroom and always wondered where it went. Without thinking I offered it back to her. I knew it belonged back in a part of the family where there were generations who could keep Grandma’s memory alive. Although I loved this little rocker, the thought of it returning to where it started its life filled my heart. My cousin has kids and grandkids who, she assured me, would all be interested in the chair.

Because she was traveling by train last summer and couldn’t take the rocker with her, my sister and I will be delivering it to her in North Dakota this week. I’m very sad to let it go and will miss its sweet presence in our house, but I know this is right and I’m happy for its future. Its energy will be alive and well long after I’m not.

Opportunities are Knocking: Feng Shui at your Front Door

It is not unusual for me to go to a Feng Shui appointment and discover that the only way the client knows I’ve arrived is to bang my fists against their front door. There is either no doorbell for me to ring or the one that is there doesn’t work. Sometimes there’s a little note taped to the doorbell informing me that it is out of order. Or there may be a small piece of tape stuck over the doorbell to hint at its dysfunction.

Of course, our first order of business once I sit down with the client is to advise them to repair the doorbell. In Feng Shui the front door can be a beacon for opportunities and possibilities that may come into your life. The doorbell is like the “voice” of the front door and can assist in bringing in more money, or a new relationship, better health or a better job, depending on your intention. Having the voice silenced doesn’t help in bringing about positive changes.

Not only should the doorbell work but it should have a sound that you like. Having watched a client wince or another one jump when a doorbell went off during consultations, I am here to say

how important it is to be able to open the front door with anticipation and

excitement, not aggravation or fright.

If the doorbell doesn’t work, a door-knocker is an appropriate substitute. A door-harp can also replace a doorbell, providing gentle ringing tones when someone arrives. Installing a wind-chime near the door, low enough for someone to reach it, is another option.

So if you want to bring in some good energy, make sure your doorbell is pleasant sounding and works consistently. Opportunity may be ringing.

Uncovering a Path and Following Its Flow

Our house has been blessed with a steep little hill in the back. It’s a great Feng Shui asset, representing protection and support. Most Feng Shui people would love to have a hill like ours in the back of their house. That said, it is still a challenge to maneuver up the hill requiring someone to crawl around on hands and knees trying to plant anything. The hill extends into our next door neighbors’ yard and they have resorted to planting grass on the surface---an interesting sight when they try to use the lawn mower. My gardener husband has planted various shrubs and lilies, hydrangeas and phlox on the hill, but by mid-summer it’s overgrown with weeds because, of course, it’s nearly impossible to scale the hill to do any maintenance.

Somewhere in the not-too-distant past, my husband and I discussed terracing the hill to make it easier to get up there. We also tossed around an idea for a path that would take us to areas of the hill we had never been able to attain. We couldn’t ever figure out how either project would work, they each sounded like a humungous undertaking, and my husband quite honestly didn’t think he could pull it off.

For some reason, this spring things were different. One warm afternoon we stood at the base of the hill and in about 30 minutes’ time, we could see where a path should go. We crawled up the hill and let it open up in front of us, around some of the shrubs, in front of others, from one end of the garden to the other. Our excitement was unbounded!

The path is in progress as I write this. We have already blessed it with some Feng Shui energy. The excitement about it is that it seems to be guiding the project. Every now and then my husband will come in and say “Look what the path is doing now!” It’s better than we could ever have done ourselves. It has come together fluidly---I won’t say easily because I’ve watched the effort it takes to lug the stones up the hill. But there is a definite organic force behind it all.

Summer-Time Feng Shui for Parents

Feng Shui business does have a cyclic pattern to it---very busy in the fall, the first of the year, and spring. Over the holidays, everyone’s schedule gets busy and money may be more of an issue. I get fewer calls during the summer as well because the kids are home from school, people are traveling, doing yard-work, going up to a cabin somewhere. No time for Feng Shui.

However this is the exact time when some Feng Shui principles would be effective to help parents maintain their balance amid the frenzy that comes with extra activities and disrupted routines. Here are a few tips:

1. Parents should have a headboard. The headboard is a significant statement about feeling supported. It should be made out of wood with no opening or slats in order to maintain a symbolic message of continuous support.

2. Remove children’s photos from the bedroom. The parents’ bedroom is a private place for them. Photos of anyone other than the people who sleep in this room should be removed. This is a statement about setting boundaries and being able to say “no” when needed.

3. Keep some areas of the house off-limits to toys and games. When the kids take over the entire house with their play-things, it signifies that they have taken over in a bigger way. The “kid energy” should be contained to not only confirm boundaries but also to teach them responsibility.

4. Make sure the master bedroom is nurturing. This is the time for the parents to ask themselves if they like their bedroom. From deliberate color choices to usable and appropriate furniture, the bedroom should be the adults’ favorite room in the house.

5. Keep the kitchen table clear of clutter. Maintain an element of control over the chaos of summer-time by refusing to let clutter gather on the kitchen table. Since this is the area where the family eats together and talks to one another, it should be treated with respect.

Implementing one or two of these tips can help parents keep a handle on summer-time chaos. When routines seem to be non-existent, integrating a few Feng Shui ideas can create areas of firm stability.

Judge the Book By Its Cover: A Feng Shui Principle

A few weeks ago, I bought a pair of adorable, expensive shoes. Shoes which I immediately realized I’d only wear for special occasions, nevertheless they more or less leapt into my hands. I bought them despite the cost and despite the rare occasions when I would need such a pair. Since then, I have found a couple of instances when they have been the perfect solution to an otherwise dull outfit. When not in use, they are stored in the box in which I bought them, prominently placed on my closet shelf. (An image of these fabulous shoes is below)

However, I discovered a surprising added benefit to those shoes, which has not only added enormously to the value of the shoes but to the pleasure of owning them. It is the box itself. It is beautifully decorated inside and out, advertisement-free, and has carrying straps. The side of the box slides out to display those marvelous shoes. In fact, I realized I love just opening the box, whether I’m going to wear the shoes or not. I have the same experience putting them away. I nestle them in the tissue paper, slide the box parts together, carry it by the color-coordinated straps to the closet shelf. A veritable shoe ritual.

I had a similar experience when I bought an expensive cashmere sweater once that came wrapped in tissue and tied with a ribbon, then placed in a special hand-made paper bag that was sized just for the sweater and tied again with matching ribbon. I went through the ritual of tying and untying ribbons for months until the bag literally fell apart.

Along this same vein, my editor Dorie and I took enormous care in designing the covers of my two Feng Shui books. There is no truth in what is said about not judging a book by its cover. She and I were determined to let the judging start the moment someone picked up the book. Similar to how I feel taking the box of shoes out of the closet or the sweater bag out of the drawer, I wanted people to have the same sense of excitement and anticipation as they picked up one of my books.

If there ever was a Feng Shui argument for making your front door appealing, this has to be it. The story of what lies behind the door (or in the box or in the bag or behind the cover page) begins before the door opens. It is a great opportunity to hint at the magnificence that is about to happen, and, in doing so, the hint becomes part of the magnificence itself.

Summer-Time Feng Shui

If it hasn’t happened already, school will be out soon. For some parents this means kids hanging around the house all day, kids getting bored, kids needing to be entertained, chauffeured, and accommodated. Rather than let this be a time of turmoil and anxiety, this is a good opportunity to incorporate some Feng Shui. Without the constraints of a school schedule, both parents and children could appropriately mark the passage of time in the child’s life by making corresponding changes in their bedroom.

Here are some questions to get the ball rolling:
Is their bedroom still age-appropriate? Summer vacation is a great time to acknowledge a passage in the child’s life. In a few months they will be heading into another level of education, taking on more responsibilities, taking another step closer to leaving the nest. Do they still have ducks on the wall? Is their comforter still covered with the images of toy trucks? Perhaps it’s time to mature the room a bit to help the child mature.

Is their bedroom conducive to good study habits? It is a parent’s responsibility to provide their child with a place to lay their heads at night. It is a parent’s gift to their child to provide them with the means of getting a good education. This message can be transmitted by making sure there is a place to study or at least a spot where they can pile their books, their back-pack or school bag. Whether they study there or not is not as important as the message about the option they have. And perhaps they will indeed find it a comfortable spot in which to crack the books.

Do they like their room? Over the summer invite your child to discuss what they like or dislike about their room. It might be solved with something as simple as a coat of paint. Some things may never be able to be changed, but sometimes an extra dresser for storage, or a different color comforter on the bed could make all the difference.

By making positive changes in a child’s life in their own personal space, positive changes can also be forthcoming in their lives as they return to school in the fall, older and better supported.

9 Steps to Feng Shui: The Cliff Notes Version

In response to people who are looking for a quick fix and who don’t know a lot about Feng Shui, I offer the following nine actions to take to bring about some difference in your life. You don’t have to do all nine steps---in fact, I discourage you from doing so. Start with the one or ones that speak to you, get clear about what kind of change you want to bring in so this activity isn’t done without a focus, and then see what Feng Shui can bring in.

1. Clear off all magnets, photos, and reminders from the front and sides of the refrigerator so you can cook in a calm environment thereby supplying you and your family with healthier food.
2. Paint your front door a different color from anything on your house so that there’s no confusion as to how good luck will find you.
3. Have a headboard on your bed to provide you the support and backing you need in your life.
4. Keep your windows clean to assure that your vision is clear and focused.
5. Take every item off the top of your dresser for nine days in order to experience spaciousness and calm. After nine days, be discerning about what you put back.
6. Close your closet doors at night so that your dreams are peaceful and pleasant.
7. To enhance your creativity and to get new ideas, re-arrange your furniture from time-to-time so you don’t always walk through your home in the same way.
8. Love the sound of your doorbell in order to eagerly open the door to new possibilities.
9. Make your bedroom your favorite room, providing a sanctuary from the rest of your day.

The Virtual Flow of Feng Shui: Tweets from the Universe

I’m taking a six-week course on social networking. I had a guarantee which would refund all my money if after the first week I didn’t find it helpful. On the contrary, I’ve found the information fascinating and exciting. Our discussions are about the endless virtual possibilities and how to access them. It would follow that the class itself is virtual. I sit home and stream the whole thing on-line on my computer.

For some of us who are familiar with the old business model of going somewhere to meet someone, engaging in face-to-face contact, joining a group that meets in a specific place on certain nights of the month, making cold-calls on someone who should buy our service/product, social networking is an entirely different paradigm. Despite what it may look like, this business model is friendlier and more people-based. Rather than doing business with someone first and possibly getting to be their friend later, social networking is based on being someone’s friend first---the business part comes later.

This is where social networking gets its bad name because on the outside it looks like all we’re doing is telling the world what we’re doing, what we had for dinner, where we’re heading for the afternoon---blah, blah, blah. It seems like inconsequential drivel, unworthy of my time. However, the valuable part of this is that someone is learning about me in small ways. They get to know a person----someone with whom they share the details of life, someone they can trust. They learn what makes me laugh and, in turn, what angers me. Once the trust has been secured, the relationship may move into the business arena. Virtual becomes profitable.

This internet world is provocative, vast and powerful. The opportunities to expand are infinite. It is Feng Shui in action in a whole new way----flow and movement transcending the physical space. This is not the time to be stagnant in any parts of life----our space, our actions, or our network. It’s the time to be in the flow.

Sweeping the Flow Under the Rug

I love when things just happen, especially when I’ve spent lots of energy trying to force it to happen. I had an experience in my dining room that exemplified to me the necessity to let stuff unfold in its own way.

Our cats access the back yard mainly through a sliding glass door going out from our dining room. Because they sometimes come in with wet little paws if it’s rained or there might have been some snow, I placed a rug there. I haven’t trained them to wipe their feet, but it did act as a slight buffer before they hit the rest of our hardwood floors. The rug disintegrated over time and I threw it out quite a while ago. That’s when the effort to find the right rug kicked in.

My argument was that it would visible from many angles of our house, so it had to be more than functional----it had to be Feng Shui perfect. It was important to find the right color to go with the dining room. I wanted it to be round if at all possible. Plus I didn’t want it to be so special (as in expensive) that having cats walk over it with wet, dirty paws would cause concern. Mind you, for years, we had a very unattractive woven thing laying there serving the purpose. I never liked it and took it away when company was coming. However, now I could put all that behind me and have an attractive rug with all the features mentioned above.

Over the last few months I found lots of rugs, tons of rugs, more than enough rugs to place in front of all our doors and more. But there was always something not quite right----color was off, too big, too small, too expensive. I’d come home empty-handed from various rug-shopping ventures, frustrated with not finding just the appropriate one. Then last weekend I went to visit my sister. She is the catalog queen, so during some down time during my visit I started looking through one of her cheesy little catalogs. What junk, I thought. What trivial nonsense. Who’d buy this crap? Wait, here’s my rug.

Sure enough, I found the perfect rug to put in front of the door—right color, size, design, price

($17). It came today and I put it in place. The cats love it (see photo of cats basking on new rug), I love it, proving once again if I didn’t try so hard, the thing I’m looking for will find me.

Does My House Dream?

The other night I woke up to some strange noises. They weren't all that loud, but loud enough that they disturbed my sleep. At first I figured my cats were playing around, but I soon discovered they were all sleeping soundly in various spots. So I tip-toed around to see if the doors were locked or if something had been knocked over. Everything seemed in perfect order. Then I heard it again.

I tried to determine where it was coming from but it was a fleeting sound, barely audible. I sat on the steps going back upstairs and waited for it to happen again. It didn't take long before I heard it once more. It was coming from nowhere but everywhere. I didn't know where to go to get closer to the sound as it seemed it was already near me but was still coming from somewhere else in the house. The sound came in irregular intervals----kind of a hum, a cough, a snicker sound. After a while everything was quiet.

As I went back to bed, I remembered how I would watch one of my little cats make noises while she slept, dreaming about catching a mouse probably, and I wondered if my house was dreaming just then. Perhaps it was dreaming about a new coat of paint somewhere or how hard it had worked to keep us warm this winter. Maybe it was dreaming about playing with our cats, or about the recent group of students I had in our home.

I like to think houses only dream about happy things. They don't stay awake at night worrying about stuff like the age of their shingles or the condition of the water heater. They don't dream about how clear their corners are. No, houses dream about joyful events and quiet, tender moments. They're at their best when they can hold an imprint of a spectacular occurrence----and that's what they dream about at night.

A few times since that night, I've heard those noises again. It's comforting to know the house feels confident about engaging in its own dreams. I love trying to figure out what might be on its mind, who or what is the catalyst for those little sounds. Maybe my house is dreaming about me. Maybe my house is remembering funny little stories about the cats, or maybe it's dreaming about the back garden. Maybe I should stop eating chocolate before I go to bed!

From Our Home to Arc: No Flood Required

I’m pretty much a fanatic about getting rid of stuff. I’ve always had the tendency to clear things out and have a great sense of accomplishment when I do so. It’s not that stuff doesn’t accumulate, but typically it never gets too far out of control before my radar kicks in and I get a handle on it.

A while ago I made a commitment to assure that stagnant situations never occur. I do this with the help of the Arc which is a non-profit organization that re-sells items—household things, clothes, some electronics, books, toys, much like a Goodwill. Monthly they send a truck through the neighborhood to pick up whatever you want to give away, eliminating the need to even have to drive to their facilities. I made a promise to myself to contribute each time the truck is scheduled to come by our house.

I have a friend who each year has a garage sale. I listen to her stories of how much work it entails, lugging stuff from the basement, setting up tables, being there through rain or hot weather, and then there’s always a whole bunch of things left over which she puts back in the basement until next year’s garage sale. When she deducts the ads she runs, she considers herself lucky to come away with $100. What is the point of that, I wonder?

Some of my beautiful clothes that I’m tired of or that don’t match my newly discovered fashion Feng Shui sense I’ve taken to a consignment shop. I get them cleaned, ironed, hung neatly on hangers, drag them into the store, wait while a clerk goes over every square inch, and then points out why they’re totally unacceptable in a loud and accusatory voice so that anyone in the store, anyone out on the sidewalk, anyone actually within driving distance can hear. I take my pile of clothes and shamefully head out the door. Who needs that?

No, I’m taking a different approach. When the Arc reminder comes in the mail, I set about looking for something to purge. I never have a lot to put out on the boulevard—maybe just one bag, or one box. But it has made me so aware of what we have stuck away in the linen closet, in drawers in the basement, hanging in my closet. When I think I can’t possibly get rid of anything else, there’s always an item that becomes an obvious choice.

Wednesday the Arc truck came by our house and I had stuff ready to go, sitting on the boulevard. I find this approach of clearing clutter respectful, easy and not at all time-consuming. I look forward to next month when once again I will have the opportunity to release some items from dark and deserted corners and closets.

No Support for Our President

Right off, I will tell you I wanted Barack Obama to be our next President. I feel he offers us some solutions to problems which are deep-seated. They may not all be the best solutions, but I felt he could jump-start some enormous, maybe painful changes we need. Nevertheless, I would have taken this blog in the direction it’s going no matter who was president, because there’s a Feng Shui problem with a simple solution that someone needs to notice.

I watched our President deliver his second press conference the other night and, again, was appalled at the arrangement of the room and his position in it. Not only does he have his back to the door but he stands IN the door during the entire duration of the event. The problem with this is that in Feng Shui, when someone has their back to the entry, they set themselves up for vulnerability. They may be caught off-guard; they may be taken by surprise around something. The first question to ask is whether he could be on the other side of the room facing that huge entry. I surmise the retort to that is "No" because it seems this is a special entry coming in from other parts, maybe restricted parts, of the White House. It seems more convenient to position him just inside the entry rather than have him walk all the way around the room.

Okay, if that’s where he has to be, couldn’t someone close the doors behind him? There are two huge doors that come in from both sides. Surely there must be enough staff who could ceremoniously close and open those two huge doors to protect him from behind. If the doors are closed, it acts like a headboard or a high-backed chair providing support and safety. Couple that with the vulnerable spot he has in the Oval Office with all those windows behind him, he could really use a Feng Shui make-over. Thank heavens he’s got that high-backed chair. I’ll bet some days that’s the only support he gets.

Is My House Bored?

My experience as a Feng Shui consultant has opened my eyes and ears to the nuanced messages a house may provide. Although we are typically known for aligning a space to fit with a person’s needs and goals, I’ve learned that a space can have its own agenda and we just don’t hear it. My house like to entertain. It likes to entertain more than I do actually. It’s not that we’re at odds with one another but sometimes something will happen when I realize the house would just simply like to have more activity in its life. This became apparent last weekend.

I rarely teach at my home anymore. Years ago I used to, but found it better for me if I did my teaching in another facility. Last weekend, however, I had a small group of students who needed to take one class in order to qualify for another coming up in May. So rather than incur the expense of renting my usual place, I invited them to my house. As soon as I did that, I became uneasy. I was concerned there wouldn’t be enough room for them, they wouldn’t have tables to write on, the cats would interfere, I’d need to make the house Feng Shui-perfect. I should have trusted my house more.

When we bought our home, we knew full well that the previous owner, and a dear friend, had hosted tons of gatherings in this house. Sometimes she’d have people here for days and days. Sometimes other people lived with her in the house as well. There was coming and going on a continual basis. In fact, after we bought it, three people showed up to turn in keys to the front door! It had indeed become a community center.

For the first few years we lived here, my step-son also lived with us which provided a fair amount of activity, some of it good and some not so good. But for the most part the number of times the front door opened and closed fell substantially after we took ownership. Being more of an introvert, I was happy for that. I felt the house, too, had moved into a more quiet and yin phase. We have found a rhythm with one another that is comfortable and secure.

Then, every once in a while, something happens that makes me realize the house remembers times past. Maybe it even misses those days, for it seems to eagerly open its arms wide and embrace anyone who comes through the door. Surprisingly, it expanded to welcome in nearly 100 people for an event a few years ago. They were all comfortable and had a great time, and remarked endlessly about how they loved the house. Likewise, it cozies up to four or five, as it did last weekend. The students who were here were very generous with their praises for the house. They, too, felt comfortable, felt "at home," the cats behaved. It was a flawless experience for all, including me.

My house entertains with fearless confidence and flair. It is less concerned about appearances than I am, instead surrounding people with its innate ability to comfort and nourish. I’m sure it has never forgotten those early glory days when it was host to many visitors and provided a backdrop for countless experiences. I need to worry less about the details and my own sense of privacy and provide my house with more opportunities to rise to the occasion and shine.

TV to Blog: Weight Management

Every month I appear on the NBC affiliate television station here in Minneapolis (KARE-11) on a program called Showcase Minnesota. I have 4-5 minutes to talk about some aspect of Feng Shui. On Tuesday, March 17th, I will be speaking about Weight Management and Feng Shui. For those who can’t watch the program, attached below are five steps to losing weight using Feng Shui principles in your home.

A full-length mirror: Having a full-length mirror somewhere in the home is essential if you want to lose weight. It not only provides you a true reflection from head to toe but also provides a base line from which to monitor changes.

A bowl of fruit: Place a bowl of fruit on the kitchen counter to represent healthy eating and vitality. It could be a distraction from the bag of chips sitting close by. If a bowl of fruit doesn’t appeal to you, a painting of a bowl of fruit strategically placed in the kitchen could provide the same message.

Eat at a table: Never eat unless it’s at a table. Someone who struggles with weight will often admit they sit in front of the television while eating dinner or they eat in their bedroom. Eating at a table or counter that is specific for enjoying a meal shows respect and honor for the process of self-nurturance.

Kitchen near entry: If the first room you see when entering your home is the kitchen, this can trigger the urge to eat, even when you’re not particularly hungry. Find another way to enter, if possible, or find a way to minimize the impact of the kitchen. Hang dramatic artwork near the entry so that your eye goes there, or place fresh flowers close by the door, or walk across a cool and dynamic rug to get your mind off the possibility of snacking.

De-clutter: True to the principle that your space reflects your life, put your home on a diet. Get rid of the excess weight you may find lying around by getting rid of things you no longer need or want.

Doing Feng Shui for weight management should be considered a support for other efforts you may be taking to lose weight. Unfortunately, it doesn’t excuse you from exercising and eating right.

Still Being Positive

As a follow-up to my last email when I complained about being interviewed on a radio show and then being preempted by the weather and a topic that had been discussed prior, I will now tell you what I would have talked about had things gone a bit more smoothly.

I was asked to come on the mid-day talk show to give some Feng Shui tips on what people can do in their work environment to create a more positive space in order to counteract the negative news that swirls around us daily. Here are the five talking points:

1. Deal with your clutter. This is a good time to deal with this stuff—in your office, on your desk. Some people have found themselves without a job at all, so they have some time on their hands. Here is an opportunity to go through those shelves, that file cabinet, those drawers in order to make room for new possibilities.

2. Change something in your office. This can run the gamut of changing the furniture all around or simply re-arranging the top of your desk. When your space changes, it changes the vibrational pattern inherent in a room/office/cubicle, which in turn changes the way you think opening you up to some new ideas.

3. Use your front door. The front door represents new opportunities coming in. Keep that door moving to maximize the security of your current job or the hopes of a better one. If it’s inconvenient to use the front door, use it as often as you can, assure that it’s easy to open and that it has a color that you love.

4. Check out your bedroom. Although this isn’t specific to the office, the bedroom still impacts your work since it’s the room where you sleep, rest, and dream. Remove everything under the bed for better flow around you; keep the closet doors closed at night to minimize the chaos coming from your clothes; remove the computer and/or television from the bedroom (even if temporarily) to maintain the quiet safety that you want in there.

5. Wear red. Red is an active color and, in the Chinese tradition, a successful color. If you don’t like red or don’t look good wearing red or any of its shades, then wear the color underneath, i.e. red cami or red boxer shorts. The active color will keep your spirits up and your enthusiasm high.

Disclaimer: These suggestions are not a substitute for doing good work at the place where you already have a job, or updating your resume and going on interviews. However Feng Shui can support your efforts to secure or hold a position you love and/or one which will ride you through the economic troubles.

Being Positive When it's all Negative

A week or so ago, I was asked to be on a radio program today to talk about Feng Shui and how it could help during these challenging times. Specifically the topic was "Creating a Positive Environment in Negative Times." This is a talk radio program and I was scheduled to have one half-hour with the host discussing ways people can change their environment to offset the negative world situation. Prior to the program the host and I had considered several ways to take the discussion prior to the program and established some talking points. She let me know that at some point she would open up the program for callers.

Although the weather was fine driving to the station, about ten minutes after I arrived, it started snowing. We had been warned of a huge snow storm headed our way so this wasn’t a surprise. By the time I went into the studio, the blowing snow made it impossible to see across the street. No one could predict the quick severity of the storm, so the first ten minutes of my time was used up by the weatherman giving listeners the latest forecast.

What I didn’t know is that prior to my segment, the host had asked listeners to call in with the name of the person they would most like to meet, dead or alive. Just as I was finally making my first point on-air, there was a caller. "KURT RUSSELL!!" she announced. I looked at my host who engaged the caller for several minutes about her preference. It was then time for a commercial and a weather update.

When we returned, I managed to finish my first point when another caller came on and gave a nice testimonial about using Feng Shui. The second caller wanted to meet Audrey Hepburn, and then the weatherman filled us in on more details. I had a moment to talk about red underwear, hear one more lengthy testimonial, have a commercial, and my time was up.

I left the station disappointed at the turn of events. A lot of effort and time had gone into preparation for this 30 minute segment which turned into no more than 5 or 6 minutes. My frustration was enhanced even further when I couldn’t retrace my steps to the parking ramp elevators (finally had to ask for help), couldn’t remember the floor I had parked on (three tries before I found my car), temporarily lost my parking ticket requiring me to find a place to pull over in the ramp and get out to search under the seat, pay $11 for one hour of parking, and spend 45 minutes driving home in a total white-out storm. The irony of the topic wasn’t lost on me----being positive when it’s negative. Somehow I mistakenly thought it was a topic I’d talk about not one I’d experience.

Chinese Valentines Day

Although the Chinese don’t necessarily celebrate St. Valentine’s Day, they do have a day devoted to the same idea. This is called Qi Qiao Jie, which takes place on the seventh day of the seventh month. This year the holiday falls on August 26th. There are two legends associated with this day.

The first version involves the seven daughters of the Goddess of Heaven who are batheing in the river. A cowherd named Niu Lang sees them and decides to run off with their clothing. Realizing that they’re in an awkward predicament, they enlist the youngest daughter, Zhi Nu, to go after him to get their clothes back. She happened to also be the most attractive of all the daughters.
Since Niu Lang has now seen Zhi Nu naked, they have to get married. The couple lived happily for several years. However, her mother, the Goddess of Heaven, eventually decided she wanted her daughter to return home. But seeing their wedded bliss, she allows them to be reunited once a year. So on the seventh night of the seventh month, magpies form a bridge with their wings enabling Zhi Nu to cross over and be with her husband and children.

The second version is less well-known. In this story, Niu Lang and Zhi Nu were fairies who had fallen in love but were living on opposite sides of the Milky Way. The Jade Emperor felt sorry for the two fairies and decided to bring them together. They became so caught up with one another that they failed to do their work. So the Emperor forbid them to be together except for one night a year—the seventh night of the seventh.

On this night, those interested in the astrological connection of Qi Qiao Jie can see Zhi Nu in the sky in the form of the star Vega, east of the Milky Way. On the west side of the Milky Way is the constellation Aquila which represents Niu Lang waiting for his lover to join him.

All You Need is Dove

In my years of experience in the Feng Shui world, I have come up with a couple pretty earth-shattering revelations. They may be obvious once I state them, but I don’t think anyone else has claimed this data, so let me be the first. I’ve discovered some common threads that run through the lives of people who study and practice Feng Shui. Sometimes it’s a certain "je ne sais quoi" that simply hits me----someone just feels or looks like they’d be open to Feng Shui. Perhaps it’s the way they’re dressed or the fact that they’re shopping at Whole Foods. Whatever. I feel a sense of camaraderie with a total stranger.

However, my theory extends far past this idea. A long time ago I witnessed the inordinate amount of my clients who had cats. I kept track for a while and I went nearly one whole year visiting clients on a brisk basis. Each one had at least one cat. The first time I visited someone who didn’t have a cat, it was just odd. Having three cats myself, I feel a real kinship with other cat owners.

Now I have another discovery. Feng Shui people, almost without exception, love chocolate. Whenever we have a birthday celebration during one of our training weekends, someone brings cake---chocolate, of course. A student will go on a baking binge and bring treats for us all---brownies. The Wind and Water School of Feng Shui is housed in the Old Arizona complex in Minneapolis, part of which is a store. One of their specialities? Chocolates. Late last fall I re-released my first book while at the same time the owners of this store were introducing a new line of chocolates, so we teamed up with a "Feng Shui and Chocolate" event. People were streaming in all afternoon, blissed out with chocolate, asking Feng Shui questions, buying my books. Fun was had by all.

Sometimes a student will say they "take it or leave it" when talking about chocolate but I’ve yet to meet anyone who despises it. Of course, there’s always the possibility that someone who hates chocolate is too intimidated to admit this fact among all of us chocoholics.
As with any hypothesis, holes could be punched into these cat-chocolate claims. No doubt there’s someone out there, a well-qualified Feng Shui consultant who can’t tolerate either. But they’ll have to admit, if they’ve done any kind of research at all, they’re in the minority. Perhaps it’s a gender thing since most of my students and clients are women, and women are known to be partial to both. Somehow I don’t really think that undermines my theory much at all—don’t know why exactly, but my argument still feels strong. Now if I could just train my cats to bring me my Dove bars.

Feng Shui Shuffle

A bit of Feng Shui happened around our house this past week. It all started a month or so ago when my husband expressed a desire to get a plasma TV. I know that left to my own devices I’d be watching a TV with rabbit ears—I’m just not that interested in what it offers. Yeah, I’ve gotten into "Brothers and Sisters" and "Numbers" but, actually, if I’m not around to watch it, I don’t really care that much. However, my ex-athlete husband loves to keep up with sports so hence his request for an improved way to do just that.

The television arrives but, of course, doesn’t fit in the cabinet in which our current one is nicely placed. We decided to move the old television and cabinet into the lower level for those moments when I can no longer tolerate the roar of stadium crowds or the squeak of tennis shoes on gymnasium floors. Then we moved an Asian-looking chest from near our front door and put it in the corner to hold the new television.

In order to integrate the old TV and its cabinet into the lower level family room, we had to move out a Chinese rice chest, so we brought it up to our second floor. We have a sitting room off the master bedroom that has never been able to define itself. It has been through at least three or four transformations without any success. But as soon as we got that chest in the room, a major shift happened and everything else seemed to fall into place. It’s the first time the room actually "worked." In order to incorporate the rice chest we had to move a side table that was originally made by my grandfather. We brought it downstairs to replace the Asian-looking chest that was originally by the front door.

It was kind of a domino dance and one which we never would have predicted the day the new TV arrived. Each piece of furniture led us to the next one as they traded real estate around the house. The furniture has taken on renewed life in their different positions; it’s as though we bought all new stuff. And we solved the issue of a long-standing problematic sitting room. The plasma television is pretty nice, too.

Fur Shui: Time Fur Everything

It seems these days we are all struggling with lack of time. Too much to do and too few hours in the day and days in the week. Even my cats remind me of this time issue. Hardly a day goes by when one of them doesn’t follow me around pathetically meowing, complaining that I take too much time doing stuff that doesn’t involve them. I’m hanging up clothes, fixing my hair, putting on make-up, going out to buy more clothes, putting on lotion, doing my nails, doing laundry. Of course, their motivation to get me to quit all this is because they either want something to eat, want to go out, want some attention, want, want, want. And here I am occupied with my own selfish activities. One day when I was looking at them it occurred to me that if we all still had fur how easy life would be.

Just taking clothes out of the equation of life would be a huge step forward in having time and energy. No shopping required, very little laundry, no ironing or dry cleaning. Nothing would need to be altered as my fur would fit my body. Anyway, a few pounds here or there----the fur would cover it.

The morning bathroom ritual would get incredibly simple. I could let go of having bad hair days because fur seems to fall into place no matter what. No more expensive hair cuts or foil jobs. I wouldn’t have to worry about sagging facial muscles as no one would notice under all the fur. All the creams, anti-wrinkle gels, make-up....no need for any of it.

Just the money saved would be reason enough to take the evolutionary step backward. Instead of clothes, we could buy more expensive food and luxurious beds to sleep in. We wouldn’t need coats anymore as our fur would keep us warm. I don’t see why we couldn’t still use the computer or use the phone even though our fingers were covered in fur. With all our extra money, we’d probably buy more expensive houses and fancier cars, take more trips, maybe work less hours.

I presume those of us who are Feng Shui consultants would find a brisk business if everyone was covered in fur. Without all the distractions of clothes, make-up, and hair, people would be more intent on having a beautiful home. They’d want their space set up in perfect order because it would be the only way to express their individuality. Having fur doesn’t allow much personal expression----maybe a snazzy collar or two but that would be about it.

Of course, if you think about it, someone would figure out how to dye patterns in your fur, how to sculpt designs into it which you’d have to keep up with regular visits to the fur salon. Collars would get more and more elaborate, more and more expensive, hand-made by other fur people, requiring mending, laundering, dry cleaning. Somehow we’d find ourselves back to where we are now: incorporating incessant and labor-intensive self-care into our lives. Then, we’d have to hire a Feng Shui professional to help with fur control.

Disconnect Between Store and Home

Despite being a Feng Shui consultant for all these years and despite claiming to know my space intimately, I apparently know nothing when I get in a store. Once again this week I was reminded of the emotional power of consumerism. I bought something for my house that I thought would be great, got it home, and now don’t like it at all. It isn’t a simple matter of taking it back because this particular item we bought it in China.

I’ve had this experience when buying clothes. I first encountered this disconnect during one of our first trips to Mexico. I bought a dress while we were there. It was adorable. I wore it almost every evening when we went out to eat; it was sassy and flirty and I felt great in it. I got it home and never wore it again. It wasn’t that I didn’t think about wearing it, but whenever I took it out of the closet, it just didn’t fit the occasion. I’d put it on in an attempt to re-create the feeling I had wearing it in Mexico, but it never worked. Rather than sassy, I looked ridiculous.

While in China recently we bought a piece of art at one of the gardens in Suzhou. We had just experienced a delightful evening tour of the garden, found ourselves in their gift shop and bought a painting. The colors were soft and muted; I was sure it would always remind us of a very enjoyable time. I have now brought it home and realize it simply doesn’t fit. I’ve walked around the house holding it up in the hopes it might land somewhere. The colors, although nice on their own, aren’t really even close to what blends here in our home. The size is awkward. I’m not remembering the great time we had in that garden but instead am a bit annoyed that we’ve got this expensive piece with nowhere to hang it.

As I see it now, we removed ourselves from our environment and got swept up in the setting, the store, the feelings, forgetting whether the item we’re purchasing is appropriate in our lives. Of course, there have been some times when I’ve bought something that far surpassed my expectations. But that’s a different side of the same coin. I’m still buying something I like in that moment without considering the context in which it will have to fit when I get home. I may get lucky or I may not. In terms of clothes, perhaps it’s a way for us to be someone else for a while, or do something we wouldn’t ordinarily do in our normal life. In terms of buying things for the home, regardless of all my Feng Shui training, I let go of the connection to my home, forgetting what will work and what won’t.

Dear House Letter

Each year my husband and I have end-of-year rituals, one of which entails writing to our house. As a Feng Shui consultant, I experience the energy of space, as do many people. A home takes on the energy from the predecessors, from the builders, from the neighbors, and from those who currently live there. Our responsibility as sentient beings is to recognize and acknowledge this energy. So my husband and I write individual letters to our home.

I have included the letter I wrote to "901" this year for you to read. You will see that I review what we’ve done in the home in terms of repairs, remodels, upgrades. And I outline what we’re planning to do in the next year (this is part of another ritual we do together on New Years—plan out house projects). This letter also gives me an opportunity to express gratitude for all that the house has done for us. You will also notice that the house has a name, an exercise I highly recommend. If reading this letter is helpful to you, I encourage you to sit down before February 4th (the Chinese New Year) and express your thoughts and ideas and grateful heart to the house in which you live. It's a simple and fun way to connect.

May this Year of the Ox bring you all that your heart desires.

Dear Jiu Ling Yi (Chinese for 901)
This past year marked our 14th anniversary together. I remain grateful for the safety and security you provide us, for the sense of "place" you exude, for the beauty you reflect our way. In all ways you have become home to us.

This past year we spent some quiet moments together painting the upstairs hall. I love this soft earth color and trust you’re finding it as soothing and delicious as we do. We continued to clear out the storage areas in the basement—as you know it becomes an inviting spot in which to dump the questionable items. This does not go unnoticed by me so do not fear that things will get out of control. Some new furniture arrived here and there during this past year replacing old pieces that had "expired," or, in the case of our bedroom furniture, finding another home in which to thrive. The addition of our pendant lights in the kitchen has added nothing but sparkle to the area; I find comfort in their golden glow. And, finally, we sealed the garage floor with an interesting textured finish to seal the crumbling cement. It has provided us the added benefit of preventing moisture from going under the driveway which caused it to buckle in past years. The front and back gardens changed in small ways, enhancing our surroundings and embellishing the innate strength that lives within and without your walls.

In the upcoming year our plans are to paint the upstairs bathroom—I get the feeling you love the chosen color, again an earth tone. You seem to be nudging us in this direction, bringing in a more grounded spirit. We plan to make some changes to the lower level living room. As you know this area is being used less and less so we have some ideas to correct that. We continue to search for the "perfect" light fixture for the powder room. I know you don’t want us to settle for anything less. We have some modest garden plans, one of which is a new hammock for the back deck, that will enable us to enjoy your beauty and inspire our souls.

Thank you for your warmth, your shelter, your quiet presence. At certain moments I hear your breath. You have been an inspiration to us and I hope we have been to you. Thank you for opening your arms to our life, our cats, our chaos at times. I am never lonely nor frightened here—I hope the same is true for you. Let us know if there is anything we can do for you.

With love,
Carole